If It's My Time
by EveGlass
Summary: Teaser extracted from my multi-chapter HOUSE OF REUNION. Patricia faces her demons, but is she creating new ones along the way? Rated T.


**Okay guys, this is a special oneshot for Rahie. It's a Pason story (sorry Peddie shippers! I recommend you read it anyway!) narrated from Patricia's POV. This is an extract from _House of Reunion, _which explains to Fabian and Nina's arguments. Head on over and check it out! I hope you enjoy them both! :)**

**Ooh, and my favourite song for Pason is 'My Love' by Sia.**

_**I'**_ve always hated hospitals. The sterile brightness seemed more sinister to me than a misty wood at midnight. But I think what was _in_ hospitals scared me more.

The others ploughed on, speaking quickly and urgently to one another. Of course, Nina and Fabian were in the lead, followed by Amber and Alfie and Jerome. I hung near the back. The search for Nurse Delia was turning into a wild goose chase. We'd asked at least four of the employees at St. Hope's Hospital, but all of them had told us that they hadn't seen her all day. The others were getting more and more frustrated, their words turning quickly into a heated argument, spearheaded of course by Nina and Fabian. As we'd all expected as soon as we recieved the invites to the reunion at Anubis House, they'd be at each other's throats from the second they gathered up the courage to actually make eye-contact.

'Ugh, this is so _your_ fault!' Nina was hissing. 'I told you she wouldn't be here!'

'Nina,' Fabian replied through gritted teeth. 'It's better to be safe than sorry.'

'Wow, that's the first time I've heard you say that in three years!' Nina spat, venom dripping from her words. Fabian rolled his eyes and sighed in frustration, throwing up his hands in submission.

Amber began to try and diffuse the tension. 'Hey guys, uhm, look there's Ward 7. We haven't checked in there yet.'

My steps faultered involuntarily. If I let them go down there, they were going to _find him. _Jerome's eyes narrowed and he stared at me suspiciously.

'Something wrong, Patricia?' He asked, deliberately loud so that the others could hear him. I scowled at him as the argument broke off and then everyone was watching me. My gaze stayed locked with Jerome's for a second. They were cold and hard, searching my face.

'Are you okay Patricia?' Fabian asked.

'Yes,' I replied, tearing my eyes away from Jerome. 'I think we should split up. It'll be easier to search for Delia if we spread out. Don't you think?' I looked around for approval. Internally, I held my breath.

Nina nodded. 'Good idea.'

I almost sighed with relief. 'Okay, I'll check Ward 7.'

'Right.' Fabian said. 'I'll take Ward 6. Amber and Alfie, Ward 5. Nina, Ward 4...'

'Don't tell me what to do.' Nina snapped.

Fabian flushed, but before the argument could pick up again, Jerome said, 'I'll go with Patricia.'

'What, no!' I said too quickly. Once again, I was being stared at. 'I mean, I don't need _you_ to help me, Slimeball. I can do it myself.'

'Just what we need. Another arguing couple.' Amber sighed, shaking her feathered silvery hair.

'Hey, he's too busy chasing after a girl five years younger than him.' I said. Before Jerome could retort, I turned and headed through the door under the sign marked _Ward 7_.

I had only been to this part of the hospital once before, with _him_, but it seemed like i knew it off by heart. I'd seen it so many times in my dreams that I could have walked around blindfolded.

When I got to his door, it was lying ajar. Coils of ice pulsed through me, mixing with my blood as I pushed it open and stepped inside.

His eyes were closed and his head was tilted slightly to the side. I closed the door quietly behind me and stood with my back pressed to it, taking in the room. It was a small room with only one bed. Next to the bed was a little cabinet with a glass jug of water and a cup on it and a small bouquet of water lilies which had started to wilt, and a small armchair. The light from the single window make the beads of sweat that collected on his pasty white face.

I moved slowly, as if in water, around to the side of the bed and sat down in the armchair, never taking my eyes off of him. As I sat there in silence, watching his chest rise and fall with each breath he took, I felt a painful lump form in my throat and my eyes fill with tears. I closed them and tried to force it all back. I shouldn't feel that way. He was a selfish, horrible person who would have let me and my friends die so that he could escape his own fate. I shouldn't feel anything for someone like him. But I _did_ feel something.

"Don't cry, Patricia."

I opened my eyes and saw that Jason Winkler was awake. He had turned his head to face me, and he was watching me with his steady iron grey eyes. The whites were bloodshot and tinged yellow. I opened my mouth to speak, but nothing came out. Jason smiled sadly.

"You took your time." He said. I could only nod. The tears were returning stronger. "Thank you for coming back to see me."

"You're welcome, Mr Winkler." I replied, trying to control my emotion-strained voice. He made an attempt at raising an eyebrow.

"Mr Winkler, huh? What happened to my first name, Miss Williamson?" Jason asked, giving me a pitiful attempt at a smile.

"Old habits die hard." I said, trying to return his smile. Seeing me cry wouldn't make him feel better, and it certainly wouldn't save him. I needed to change the subject. "So, uhm, how are you?"

'You're asking me how I am?' He said, incredulous. 'How do I _look_?'

I looked up and met those sick, sick eyes. "Terrible."

Jason turned his head to look at the wall opposite him and winced. "The doctors said they think I need to rest." Then he laughed. It was a rasping noise like a knife on stone that wasn't at all like how I remembered it. "That's all I ever do in here. And it's not like it's going to do anything." He smiled. "Can I ask you something?"

"Of course... Jason," I said. His name seemed strange and foreign on my tongue.

"Why didn't you come and see me?"

"I'm sorry," I could hardly breathe around the lump in my throat, and the tears began spilling relentlessly down my cheeks. I wasn't looking for an excuse: there wasn't one. This time, the silence was longer, filled with a thousand unasked questions. 'I... I thought i was doing the right thing by letting them put you in this place.'

"I'm sorry too." Jason said eventually without turning to look at me. His face and eyes were stony and hard.

"For what?" I asked quietly, not trusting my voice to go any louder.

He turned to look back at me. "You know what I mean, Patricia."

"I do." I said quietly. Then I watched as Jason lifted his arm with great difficulty. The skin was thin and chalky white, and I could see every vein that twisted under the skin. I sat completely still as he raised his hand to my face and touched my cheek hesitantly with his fingertips. They were fever hot. I blushed scarlet. "Jason, I…" But I couldn't finish.

"I've missed doing that." He told me, brushing a strand of my hair behind my ear and smiling. More tears rolled down my face. I looked into his eyes and he smiled. I'd missed it too. I'd missed him being there.

'You asked me to stop. You trusted me to stay with you until... until...' I sobbed. I remembered perfectly, the day they'd taken him to hospital. He's looked into my eyes as deeply as if he'd been looking into my soul, and I could see the hurt and disappointment and bitter fury. I couldn't ever bring myself to go and see him. I knew that he would look exactly like he did now, and it would break my heart. I couldn't bring myself to look him in the eyes. I didn't want to see him like that. But then, there I was.

"I love you, Patricia Williamson." Jason told me, moving his fingers to my mouth and tracing my bottom lip with his thumb. 'With all I have left myself.'

I laughed through the veil of tears, feeling them run down my cheeks. "And I love you, Jason Winkler." And I leant forward and kissed him.

Heat exploded in my belly, splaying out across my body, radiating the need and the sadness and the love and the anger everywhere. I poured everything I had into the kiss. For just a tiny moment, a tiny, _tiny_ moment, I was seventeen again, and it was the end of another school day. Like always, we'd meet up in the woods and kiss so passionately that I'd come away shaking and breathless. Those kisses had always been so much better than the rare stolen ones when we were in his classroom.

I tasted my own tears. I was sobbing and holding him. I never wanted to let go.

'Who the Hell are you?'

My head snapped up. There was a young man in the doorway, a few years older than me, with thick, curly black hair, a square jaw and stone grey eyes. He was carrying a plastic bag full of shopping, and he would have been quite handsome if he didn't look like a wolf who was about to tear my throat out. 'I said, who are you?' He asked impatiently, taking a step forward.

'Richard, this is Patricia. She's an old friend.' Jason said carefully.

'Old friend? Is that what you call what you were doing?' Richard asked, eyeing me.

'Cool it, Hulk.' I retorted.

'Hey girly, I'd advise you keep away from my brother. He's in pain and he doesn't need the likes of you...' His eyes flicked up and down over me, assessing my clothes. 'Leeching on him.'

'_He_ is still in the room.' Jason said meekly. Neither of us payed attention.

'Leeching?' I parroted. 'I dare you to say that again. Go on.'

'I wouldn't waste my breath.' Richard replied.

'Coward.' I spat.

'_Enough!_' Jason said as loud as he could. He sounded like his old self, the man strong enough to keep a class of twenty teenagers in check. Then he burst into a fit of rasping coughs. Richard threw down the bag of shopping.

'Look at what you've done now!' Richard hissed. 'Jason? Jason? Are you okay? Do you need the doctor?' Jason shook his head weakly as Richard helped him sit forward.

I put my hand on Jason's knee and ignored the daggered look Richard shot me.

Eventually Jason's coughing subsided.

'Stop it both of you. The last thing I want is the two people I care the most about in the world to argue over my deathbed.' Jason said.

Richard sat down on the bed and took his brother's hand. 'You're not dying Jason.'

Jason laughed again, knife on stone. 'Richard, stop trying to deny it. If it's my time, it's my time.' His eyes went from his brother's face to meet my eyes. They moistened immediately.

Jason's words were so definate, so final, that neither Richard nor I could find a reply. The only thing that I could think as we looked into each other's eyes was '_My fault, my fault, my fault..._'

**So there you have it. A little teaser from _House of Reunion_. Let me know what you think. Drop me a line in the comments or by message or by my twitter EveGlass_Author. Thanks!**


End file.
